When Co-Parenting Becomes Dangerous: The Laura Clery and Stephen Hilton Case, DVROs, and Post-Separation Abuse Under California Law

Editor’s Note: This story discusses addiction and its impact on families. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, the SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders. Call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for assistance.

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The ongoing legal and personal crisis between author and comedian Laura Clery and her ex-husband, composer Stephen Hilton, has become a deeply public unraveling of a once-collaborative relationship. What began as a seemingly amicable co-parenting arrangement has devolved into a disturbing pattern of abuse, harassment, and increasingly erratic behavior—raising serious concerns under California’s family and criminal law systems.

While many first came to know Laura and Stephen through their creative and often humorous online presence, known for its openness about parenting and mental health, their current situation highlights far more serious issues. From domestic violence restraining orders (DVROs) and custody safety to digital harassment and post-separation abuse, the legal implications of their dispute offer an important look at the protections California law provides to survivors and children in high-conflict family matters.

A Public Breakdown in a Private Relationship

Laura Clery and Stephen Hilton were once known as a creative and quirky couple who brought humor and vulnerability to their online content. After several years of marriage, they separated and eventually divorced, sharing joint custody of their two children. For a time, their co-parenting relationship appeared functional, with both parties maintaining involvement in their children’s lives.

However, in recent months, concern grew around Stephen’s behavior. Described by many as increasingly erratic and paranoid, he shocked fans—and Laura—by revealing on social media that he had relapsed on drugs. Laura has since stated that she was entirely unaware of the relapse until he publicly posted about it online, despite the fact that he had recently been spending unsupervised time with their children and even driving them. Hilton has denied using drugs while caring for the children, but Laura—herself a recovered alcoholic who will celebrate 14 years of sobriety on October 29th—has rightly pointed out the dangers of relying on the word of someone in active addiction.

Laura responded by doing what many parents in recovery and family law attorneys would recognize as a responsible step: she temporarily suspended the children's visits with their father until he could demonstrate sobriety. Her focus was on the children’s safety, a priority California law upholds as paramount in all custody decisions. What followed, however, was an escalation that has alarmed not only her followers but legal observers as well.

While Laura had previously remained silent about many of the private struggles in her marriage, she has now come forward with deeply troubling details. As she revealed in a June 2025 video and confirmed in interviews and public posts, the relationship included physical abuse. At one point during their marriage, Stephen assaulted Laura—an incident serious enough to result in his arrest. While she did not share any more details about the alleged assault, according to court records, the English music producer was arrested in Los Angeles on December 18, 2022, for “Battery On Spouse / Cohabitant / Former Spouse.” His bail was set at $20,000. Despite that, Laura forgave him in an effort to preserve the co-parenting relationship for the sake of their children. She hoped things could improve. But the abuse didn’t end. It continued in cycles—intensifying, subsiding for a while, and then returning.

Even after their divorce, Laura tried to maintain stability and positivity. She and Stephen even launched a co-parenting podcast together in an effort to share their experience and help others navigating similar terrain.

At the filming of the joint podcast, which has been allegedly removed by Hilton during his hack of the YouTube channel, Hilton revealed he had been sober. Unfortunately, it was shortly after the filming that he relapsed again. Since clearing the air about their struggles with Hilton’s addiction to narcotics (including fentanyl), Clery has been very vulnerable with sharing what it has been like to coparent with someone in active addiction. Their young children, Alfie, seven, and Poppy, four, are accustomed to seeing their father regularly, and Clery has aimed to continue this normalcy as much as possible even through Hilton's active addiction stages.

When speaking about their co-parenting relationship, she said, “It’s feeling good. It’s feeling functional... and I just feel like wow, everything is good. You know, even in his life, he’s gotten some music opportunities that are really exciting, and I feel like I’m getting some opportunities with my podcast and making progress on my book. It’s just, life is feeling good and then I open up Instagram three days ago to a video of him talking about he’s in active addiction, and he’s using and he’s documenting the whole thing,” she adds. “And my heart is broken. And I feel so stupid, and I feel so angry because you were just picking up my kids from... our kids from school.”

But when Stephen’s behavior deteriorated again—especially after his drug relapse—any meaningful co-parenting became impossible.

Laura attempted to draw a clear boundary: she still permitted supervised visitation, but the children could no longer stay overnight with him until he could prove he was sober. This decision was not made out of spite—it was grounded in personal experience, recovery wisdom, and maternal responsibility. Laura has spoken publicly about the fact that if she were drinking or using drugs, she would not expect to have custody of her children either.

Clery explained later, “I guess it just makes it a little trickier when you’ve got kids in the mix and it’s really f***ing sad to me because again, he’s such a good dad, especially when he’s clean. He’s so loving, he adores them and we have so much fun together and yeah, my heart just breaks for the kids.” She starts tearing up thinking about boundaries she has to put in place to keep them safe. “Yeah, like over the weekend he was supposed to have them on Saturday. It’s like no, you’re not seeing the kids. You’re on drugs, you’re not seeing the kids and they ask for ‘daddy, daddy, daddy’ and it’s like ‘no we’re not doing daddy’s house this weekend, you know, he’s busy.’”

When she set that boundary, the harassment and abuse began to escalate once again. Laura feared—based on their past—that the harassment would escalate into another physical assault. That fear led her to seek and obtain a Domestic Violence Restraining Order (DVRO) to protect both herself and her children. The restraining order was a legal step to enforce boundaries and ensure safety, supported by California law, which recognizes that abuse can be physical, emotional, and psychological.

Only after the DVRO was issued did Hilton allegedly engage in a disturbing new wave of digital abuse. According to Laura, he began electronically stalking and targeting her, in clear violation of the court order. He allegedly hacked into her social media accounts—platforms she depends on to support her family financially—and began deleting YouTube videos, one by one, erasing years of monetized content and disrupting her livelihood. He altered her Facebook posts and began impersonating her online, posting messages designed to frame her as alienating him from their children. At one point, Hilton posted a screenshot from Laura’s Facebook account to his own Instagram story, attempting to depict her as the aggressor. However, followers quickly noticed that the screenshot showed he was logged into Laura’s account, revealing that he had been the one to post the content in her name. Laura later reposted a fan’s comment highlighting this, which pointed out the evidence plainly visible in the image.

▶️ View Laura’s Instagram post with the screenshot evidence here: https://www.instagram.com/p/DLQwLe7SQMw/

Since that time, Hilton’s public behavior has become increasingly erratic. He has offered contradictory explanations for his drug use, at one point claiming it was a reaction to being kept from his children, and at another calling it a “30-day art experiment” to enhance his creativity. In one alarming incident, he allegedly took the children from their nanny’s care without permission and drove them in a high-speed sports car without booster seats. He has made a series of bizarre public statements, including that publishing giant Simon & Schuster is using internet bots to destroy him—a claim without factual basis.

In addition, Hilton has reportedly been producing sexually suggestive content for an OnlyFans account, including material in which he reads erotic stories in a “Daddy Dom/Little Girl” persona. Fans have noted disturbing similarities between the tone of that content and recordings he previously made for his daughter, raising questions about his judgment and behavior.

Despite the court order, Hilton has continued attempting to contact Laura electronically in a very public way—actions that may violate California Penal Code § 273.6 and support a contempt finding in family court. Violations of a DVRO are taken seriously in California and can result in criminal prosecution, custody modifications, and additional protective orders.

Laura addressed these developments in a powerful Instagram post on June 26, 2025, stating:

“Has anyone else experienced post-separation abuse and how did you protect yourself? #postseparationabuse #idiotpodcast”

She followed with a comment addressing criticism for speaking out publicly:

“Staying silent protects the abuser… not the victim. Abusers count on our silence to continue their control and manipulation behind closed doors. Speaking out shines a light on the abuse, helps keep me and others safe and breaks the cycle for anyone else going through it. Sharing my story isn’t about drama… it’s about survival, truth, and reclaiming my voice after being violated, silenced and publicly smeared. I have a restraining order yet he continues to harass me and has even deleted my platform and work. Silence would be complicity. This is post-separation abuse and it’s real.”

Now that Laura has broken her silence and publicly confirmed that she has reported the restraining order violations to law enforcement, both she and the public await to see what legal consequences Stephen may face.

California Law’s Response to Post-Separation Abuse

Although the term post-separation abuse is not explicitly defined in the California Family Code, the conduct associated with it—emotional abuse, financial sabotage, digital stalking, harassment, and coercive control—is fully recognized as abuse under both California state law and federal law.

Under Family Code § 6203, abuse includes not only physical violence but also threats, harassment, and behavior that disturbs the peace of the other party. Family Code § 6320 allows courts to enjoin conduct that interferes with a party’s mental or emotional calm. Section § 6320(c) specifically includes economic abuse, such as destroying someone’s income or preventing them from working.

Digital contact in violation of a DVRO is illegal. Unauthorized access to someone’s accounts also violates California Penal Code § 502 and the federal Computer Fraud and Abuse Act (18 U.S.C. § 1030). Under federal law, such actions can be charged as a felony, particularly where data is deleted, monetized platforms are compromised, or reputational harm is caused.

Additionally, the deletion of monetized videos and impersonation may lead to civil liability for conversion and intentional interference with prospective economic advantage, both of which carry the potential for compensatory and punitive damages.

These actions reflect tactics identified in the Power and Control Wheel, a tool used by advocates to describe the patterns of coercive control common in abusive relationships. Post-separation abuse often includes financial interference, manipulation of the children, stalking, emotional abuse, and legal intimidation.

When court orders are violated, protected parties may bring a contempt proceeding under California Code of Civil Procedure § 1211, asking the court to issue an Order to Show Cause (OSC). Penalties for contempt can include fines, jail time, and further custody or visitation restrictions.

Legal Protection Is Available

Laura Clery’s case is not just a high-profile family dispute—it’s a real-time illustration of how abuse can persist even after separation. Many parents struggle with post-separation abuse, especially when co-parenting with someone who is unstable or actively addicted.

If you are in a similar situation, we strongly encourage you to listen to Laura’s podcast episode, “Post Separation Abuse,” available now on Spotify.

🎧 Listen on Spotify

The second half of the episode includes a powerful meditation for survivors and parents navigating these high-stress situations.

But awareness alone is not enough. These problems do not resolve on their own. If you are experiencing post-separation abuse, it is essential to seek legal help as soon as possible. California law provides tools to enforce boundaries and protect your family.

Contact our office today for a confidential consultation with an attorney experienced in high-conflict custody, restraining orders, and family violence.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233,Text START to 88788, or visit https://www.thehotline.org.